This is the final ranking of the 2009 season. We enjoyed taking our shots at teams and for the most part, they deserved them…. Enjoy the playoffs!
Rank/Team/WL/LW
HEAVYWEIGHT DIVISION
1.Chargers 13-3 (1) Rivers doesn’t get enough respect, other than Peyton there is no other QB I’d rather have at this point including Brady who is playing more like Drew Bledsoe than his former self.
2.Colts 14-2 (2) They’d better hope they can shake the rust in two weeks or Polian will have some splaining to do…..
3.Cowboys 11-5 (5) Playing as well as anyone in the league, not just the NFC… of course they still have Uncle Wade as a handicap for the playoffs, but still…
4.Vikings 12-4 (8) They have a decent shot as long as they play at home, if they have to travel it’s all over for the bald guy and Mr. Grey beard….
5.Packers 11-5 (6) It would make my year if Green Bay can beat Arizona and set up a 3rd game with Minnesota and then stick it to Brett Fart….
6.Saints 13-3 (4) The problem with good starts is most teams peak too early and can’t regain the mojo at playoff time.
7.Eagles 11-5 (3) What once was a promising season is headed for the toilet unless they can do a 180 in Dallas this week.
8.Ravens 9-7 (11) Not a juggernaut but are ecstatic to get in the dance, and now that they’re in; they want to unload on pretty-boy Brady.
9.Patriots 10-6 (9) This team could always be counted on to make the plays in crunch time, now they become unglued in crunch time. This is by FAR the worst playoff team in Belichick’s tenure….
10.Steelers 9-7 (12) Woodley or whatever-his-name-is can bitch about Cincy and NE laying down, but really he just needs to look in the mirror.
11.Texans 9-7 (13) This team is as good or better than the 4 bottom seeds in the AFC playoffs…
12.Cardinals 10-6 (7) Will the real Arizona team please enter and sign in please……
MIDDLEWEIGHT DIVISION
13.Bengals 10-6 (10) I know the game didn’t mean much to Cincy, but god did they get steamrolled or what? Time to put on the big-boy pads this week if you hope to survive….
14.Falcons 9-7 (15) Need to add some defense for next year…
15.Jets 9-7 (17) Got two big X-mas gifts to make the playoffs and Fat Rex didn’t apologize for it.. As long as the Sanchise doesn’t have to carry a big load, they can beat Cincinnati. Here’s hoping Sandy Sanchise has a BIG workload….
16.Panthers 8-8 (16) They didn’t quit and got some good late season wins but that just showed how stubborn Fox was earlier in the year with Jake “human-interception-machine” Delhomme.
17.Broncos 8-8 (14) Little Hoodie with the Napoleon Complex got humbled when all was said and done….only fitting, it shouldn’t be that easy little man……
18.Titans 8-8 (18) Only good thing about their year is it resurrected VY’s career and made Coach Porn Stache look like an idiot in the process….
19.Dolphins 7-9 (19) Tony “I-look-tough-with-my-sunglasses-in-my-press-conferences” Sparano couldn’t come up with enough gimmicks to repeat as AFC East champs.
20.Niners 8-8 (22) One of my 2010 breakthrough teams of the year….
21.Bears 7-9 (23) How does Lovie Smith survive year after year? Just about everyone on his staff has to walk the plank, but he had nothing to do with another lousy year? C’mon….
22.Giants 8-8 (20) Gee it seems it was just yesterday that the media were calling this GM a genius and their roster the best in football…. Ah…the Peter King effect……just goes to show you the media knows squat…
23.Browns 5-11 (24) Mangina, you’re probably getting whacked as I write this, and it couldn’t happen to a nicer rat….
LIGHTWEIGHT DIVISION
24.Jags 7-9 (21) Another coach who keeps his job year-after-year while his teams never improve…where does he keep the incriminating pictures?
25.Bills 6-10 (25) Started their youth-movement by hiring a 70 year old GM.. Well he’s at least 10 years younger than the last one, Marv Levy….
26.Chiefs 4-12 (30) Made their year to bury Denver and give a big eff you to cocky McDaniels for rubbing it in at the end of their previous game…
27.Raiders 5-11 (26) Just a QB away from contending in the AFC West but knowing Al Davis, he will bring in a coach that will play Russell.
28.Bucs 3-13 (28) The Kid saved his job with some good games in the second half of the year… now he just has to find coordinators who he can stick with for a whole year..
29.Redskins 4-12 (29) Good luck Shanahan with that owner… hope you have a good contract that you can get out of if he does what he usually does….
30.Seahawks 5-11 (27) Clueless in Seattle…. A team going nowhere fast.
31.Lions 2-14 (31) Can you send football players to winter-ball to get more experience?
32.Rams 1-15 (32) With the first pick in the 2010 NFL draft, St. Louis selects…….